Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Without Apology

Good Morning Humble Readers...

All is well, here on the semi-frozen flatland.  We woke up to snow this morning.  Not much, but enough to remind us that this is Alberta, and snow can come anytime, especially in the spring. 

(at some point soon, I will write a post that isn't related to this pregnancy, hpts, doctor's appointments... I'm just a little tunnel-visioned right now.  If that means that you can't read for a while, I totally get it.  I hope that you will stick with me on this road, but if you need to take a detour, that's okay.  I understand.)

I made another decision last night.  My Beloved and I were discussing the future, particularly the nursery.  What colour I want to paint it, what we will need for furniture, and whether or not we will use cloth diapers. 

With every topic we discussed, I led off with, "I'm getting ahead of myself here..." or "If we get to that point..." or "I know I should wait to think about this..."  After three or four statements that started like that, I needed to stop.  I needed to acknowledge what was really going on in my head. 

As much as I want to not let the past colour my feelings about this pregnancy, that anxiety/fear/worry is there.  And it's not going to go away anytime soon. 

As I've stated before, I want and plan to cherish this pregnancy, no matter how long it lasts.  I want to dream and plan, to talk about the things that others who aren't a part of this club talk about when they're expecting. 

So, going forward, there will be no more provisos, no more apologies, no more if, only when... I am pregnant and I am going to let that sink in and even let it take priority in my thoughts.  Heck, I might even think about maternity leave. 

It still doesn't seem real.

19 comments :

  1. First of all, congrats on the happy news! I'm really pleased for you! Secondly, I think it is a good decision to cherish each second of this pregnancy. I am saying a prayer for you that this will be a sticky bean and a happy and healthy nine months for you!

    ~ICLW~
    #69

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  2. It is so difficult to be hopeful but good for you for deciding to be positive and hope for the future.

    As for the snow, I guess I shouldn't point out how green it is here, right? ;)

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  3. Congrats!!! I'm just catching up on my blog reading and I am so excited for you guys! yay!!

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  4. Congratulations, and I'm glad to hear that you are enjoying your pregnancy as you deserve to do. All best wishes!

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  5. It's hard to forget the sting of a burn isn't it? I'm praying for you and your bean. FX!

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  6. Somehow I missed your fantastic news! Congratulations. And, kudos for your positivity!

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  7. This made me a little misty-eyed, as your goal for yourself---to focus on the positives aspects of being PG for the duration of the pregnancy-- is my hope for myself if I get PG again. Kudos to you for the optimistic outlook.

    Big hugs!

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  8. You have such a great outlook. I wish that some of that would rub off on me! Keep us posted on your plans...and cherish every moment.

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  9. Good for you! I did that with when I was pregnant with Zilla. Is was SO freeing and at some point I was able to do it without "forcing" myself to do it. I hope and pray that you get to that place SOON!
    *HUGS*

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  10. oh mrs g, I can't beleive I've missed your big moment!! WOW!! I've been consumed by my own little world lately and missed the last week or two of catching up, I read everything in chronological order and was filled with tears of joy, fear and understanding! I pray this is the sticky BFP you've waited so long for, but I know how hard it is to keep the faith! I'm 4 weeks away from my edd and still wonder if it's real and if babe is safe, etc. and I only had one MC.

    Try to stay as positive as you can, it really all goes by too quickly! Good luck on Fri with your appointment at the OB, and just remember Fri is pretty darn good for getting in with an OB this early on! I had to wait until 12 weeks before seeing mine!! and I was being monitored by him for fertility treatments!!

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  11. Enjoy, Missus G, and good luck with your appointment!

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  12. Sending you all sorts of good vibes! So excited for you!!

    Happy ICLW!

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  13. *slapping self*...see this is what I get for being away from bloggyland.

    CONGRATULATIONS!!!

    I hope that you are able to live through it like a normal pregnancy, and that all the next milestones are fabulous ones!

    Good Luck!

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  14. Congrats on your pregnancy! Fabulous news - wishing all the best for a safe and happy 9 months xx

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  15. Congrats girl! I know how you feel I am 8w4d today and it still doesn't seem real to me! I keep waiting for each next ultrasound to help cement it in. So excited for you!

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  16. Very happy for you. May your road from here one out be an uneventful one!

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  17. Congratulations!

    You're absolutely right - enjoy EVERY minute, dreams an' all. You won't ever regret having those times to think and dream, and the more prepared you are the better it will be when YOUR BABY COMES! It's so exciting!

    xxx

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