Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Bloggity Summer Camp: The Kindest Thing

Howdy Humble Readers...

Your favourite hobbit/ent family is still on vay-kay, visiting with the family in Kel.owna.  This post is brought to you by the wonders of scheduled posting... yay!  I sure hope that you're all doing well, and I am looking forward to catching up with you all when I get home. 

Today at Bloggity Summer Camp, Calliope our fearless Camp Director has asked, "What is the kindest thing anyone has ever done for you? Did you repay the kindness? Did you blog about it?"

Sometimes I feel like I'm beating a broken record here, but really there can only be one event in my life that can count for the 'kindest'.  Be advised this is a long story.

When I was sixteen, just home after a three month exchange program to Germany, I made a new friend.  She quickly became my best friend, a sister by choice.  Soon I was spending every weekend at her house and at least two nights during the week. 

At this time, I was in the custody of my bio-mom.  After she and my bio-dad divorced, when I was 9, it was like she reverted back to her teen years.  I'm sure she felt entitled, seeing as she gave up the 'party years' because she got pregnant with me when she was 17. 

She would spend evenings out in bars, partying and drinking.  She met a guy who was a lot older than her and she got married a second time.  Although they lived together for 2 years, the marraige only lasted a few months before everything went bad.  After her second divorce, she went right back to her old ways. 

She worked a string of no-where jobs (waitressing, housekeeping, etc), and we were often on government assistance (read: welfare).  She didn't know how to manage money, and often I had to remind her that we had to pay rent (rather than, say, a fringed suede jacket or a month's worth of smokes).  And don't even get me started on the lack-of-groceries situation.

Actually, yeah, I will tell you about that...  We usually only had food in the house for one meal a day.  I went to school without breakfast, and had nothing to take for lunches.  This was when my 'foster' parents (Mom & Dad) stepped into my life.

It started with Mom making a second lunch for my best friend, S, to bring to school for me.  Every day.  For almost a whole school year.  They even took me on vacation with them to Disneyland and on a huge road trip that covered 12 states. 

The following summer, S & I got a really lousy job together with a telemarketing firm.  I was spending a huge amount of time with the family.  It was amazing to me to know that there was food in the fridge and there weren't strange guys in and out of the house (did I mention my bio-mom's HIV scare?). 

Mom & Dad started dropping hints that if I ever needed a safe place, they would welcome me with open arms. 

September of my senior year, just before my 17th birthday, I broke.  I was sick of being a grown up while my bio-mom played the kid role.  I was tired of her broken promises, and always wondering if this would be the month we would be evicted or if that would be the guy who would hurt her real bad.  It was all too much.  And then, somehow, she gained custody of my bio-sister. 

I couldn't believe it.  I was a total mess.  I couldn't take care of myself, my bio-mom, and now my 13 year old bio-sister too.  It sounds incredibly selfish, but I needed out.  I left, and my Mom & Dad welcomed me with open arms.  They didn't think twice... I was their other daughter, I was part of the family. 

And that's the story of the kindest thing... they gave me a family. 

(sorry for all the long-windedness)

4 comments :

  1. I love this story. It brought tears to my eyes and is the very definition of the word kindness.

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  2. Im glad God was looking out for you and had a place for you to go!

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  3. What an amazing story. No, you weren't selfish for moving out from that chaos. You were lucky to have such a wonderful family to embrace you and take you in.

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  4. Oh sweetie, no one deserves to go through what you dealt with and I am so thankful and relieved you had such a kind, loving family to take you in.

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