Friday, July 10, 2009

Galactic Badness!

Well Humble Readers, it's been a couple of days... a real @#$! couple of days! Now, don't get me wrong, nothing tragic has happened. Uncle Murphy has been visiting and schooling me in his particular branch of the legal system.

Most of it is work specific, so I won't go into it, but two stories are actually kind of funny now. Both have to do with me trying to eat lunch while at work.

Yesterday, after dealing with several aggravating things (having to be at work at 7am, two key staff members calling in sick, computer issues, and grumpy staff and customers, etc) I was dying to go for my lunch break. I get out of the store, and it's raining. I get to the juice/smoothie place down the block, place my order, open my wallet to pay for my pineapple-strawberry frozen concoction and panini... only to discover that my Beloved has my debit card.

And I have no cash.

Flat broke.


And that pineappley frozen goodness is there in front of me. Taunting me.

I ask the girl behind the till to please be patient. On my dash through the rain back to the store, I call my Beloved and not so politely ask him to check his jacket pocket. Sure enough, my card is there. Grrr! He can't get it to me for at least another half hour. I run into my store, and track down my boss. I find him in the office (thankfully!) and beg to borrow some cash. (how humiliating!) He is a kind and generous soul and takes pity on me, and I then dash back to the smoothie place, pay for my lunch, and my day continues.

Fast forward to this morning at 11:30, lunchtime. This morning was relatively ok. A few computer glitches, a few cranky customers, but mostly all is well. I head out of the store and down to my lovely juice place. I order my pineappley-strawberry frozen delight and my panini (I'm nothing if not a creature of habit). This time, all goes well... payment is made and I head back to the store.

I'm almost to the staff room, having only taken a few sips from my pineapple-strawberry frozen cup of heavenly goodness. I'm looking forward to sitting down with my smoothie, my sandwich, and my book and enjoying my break. One of the staff comes up behind me, startling me. I swear she walks on cat feet... I totally didn't hear her approach and when she asked me a question she startled me so much that I actually squeezed the cup so hard that I put my thumb through the cup.

So now I'm standing just outside the staff room door, with frozen pineappley-strawberry goodness gushing out of the cup... over my hand... down my arm... all over my shirt... and my new shoes... and the carpet.

And the staff member who startled me? She's standing there laughing her ass off at me!

So I have to hustle into the staff room and dump what's left of my drink into the garbage *sniff* and attempt to make some sense out of the mess. I ended up spending half my break getting cleaned up (and cleaning up the carpet).

And then ate my panini with a from the vending machine instead. *pout*

So my Humble Readers, I ask you... Dare I tempt fate (if I actually believed in fate) tomorrow and go for a smoothie again?

What the heck... what else could possibly go wrong?


  1. oh no! Good luck if you try again.

  2. Not the NEW SHOES!! I hate it, HATE IT when that happens.

    Tomorrow, take your book TO the Smoothie place and eat it there, away from coworkers who should be shaken until comatose. Or at least put a bell around that bitch's neck.

  3. I am sure third time's the charm! Go for another smoothie and pour it into a steel cup! :)

    So sorry for all the lunch time hijinx. Tomorrow is another lunch break, right?

    Thank you so much for the kind words on my blog... it is amazing to have so many awesome women cheering for me and my boys. :) THANK YOU!

  4. City Girl's comment about the bell cracked my shit up. Hmmmmmm smoothie or not? I think it may be the pineapple-strawberry smoothie curse. I suggest mango or blueberry instead. Then walk around the smoothie shop counter-clockwise while drinking your new flavor mumbling "cat bell bitch debit card smoothie carpet shoes" 3 times to break the curse. OK. I am going insane. :-)


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