Our local health region hosts an annual memorial service for families who have lost babies during pregnancy, during birth, or shortly after birth. The service was beautiful. There were close to 100 people there... parents, grandparents, siblings, and friends... all grieving in one way or another. There were some comforting words said, some nice music played, and a lot of tears shed.
Today has been a day to celebrate.
My darling one and I made a decision today. We decided that we could no longer refer to our baby as the 'little bean' or just 'she'. She needed a name. I will admit when he first brought it up, my instinct was to say no. How could we name someone who we never met? But during the service today I spent a lot of time thinking about it, and a name floated to the surface of my heart.
Hope.
We never got to hold her. We never got to find out what color her eyes were, or if she would have her daddy's thick hair. We never got to discover her personality. We never heard her cry or laugh. But that doesn't make her any less of a person. She was real... is real. We had a daughter.
For the happiest 11 weeks of my life, I cherished the knowledge that our little girl was ours. I still cherish that knowledge. I always will.
Emily Hope
Cherished Daughter
Forever With God
September 11, 2008
Cherished Daughter
Forever With God
September 11, 2008
So I am looking through old posts for Bingo and I come across this one and it throws me for three reasons. 1) Though I have read your blog before (a big thumbs up to your book rating scale by the way, the hairy hobbit toes had me and my husband smiling) I have never before thought to go to the beginning and I am glad I found this beautiful post. 2) My niece's name is Emily Hope, so I am partial to thinking it is just an absolutely beautiful name. 3) I, too, miscarried on September 11th (2007 though.) I think that this post really speaks to the love that you have for your little girl and you are right, you will always cherish her. Thinking of you.
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